Best Ad Evar…

October 29, 2008

I posed up for this Ad from nom nom skins.  I’m in love.  Not just with the amazingness of the picture, but the caption, which I think sums Nadia up in a tidy nutshell.

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He Got a Shave

October 29, 2008

I won’t post the log, it was a little rushed and I was typing through a hellacious cold.  But the short version.  we ditched the beard and made him look more…administrative….

Just C & Ping a log…I don’t think there’s alot to add to this.

 

[2008/10/24 1:35]  Nima Sirnah: Okay tell me something positive about him now

[2008/10/24 1:35]  Nima Sirnah: I’m getting a bad impression

[2008/10/24 1:35]  Syngen Sohmers: He does have a sense of humor.  Seriously.

[2008/10/24 1:35]  Nima Sirnah: I’m one of those black and white people, if I like you, you can do nothing wrong, and if I don’t like you, you do nothing right.

[2008/10/24 1:35]  Nima Sirnah: I know this failing about myself and I’m combatting it!

[2008/10/24 1:35]  Syngen Sohmers: And he has huge respect for my marriage

[2008/10/24 1:36]  Syngen Sohmers: He’s also the reson I can build

[2008/10/24 1:36]  Nima Sirnah: I’m gonna need moar

[2008/10/24 1:37]  Syngen Sohmers: Okay…

[2008/10/24 1:37]  Syngen Sohmers: I was on my way out of Gor.  Done with it.  There was so much drama on Tyros that I actually dreaded logging on.  When I did, I would go anywhere but gor.

[2008/10/24 1:37]  Nima Sirnah: yuuup.

[2008/10/24 1:38]  Syngen Sohmers: So, he IMs me one day, completely random and tells me “I’m fascinated with your culture, tell me more.”

[2008/10/24 1:39]  Syngen Sohmers: And we clicked.  He’s scary smart, funny, so geeky it’s cute.  Strong when he needs to be.

[2008/10/24 1:39]  Syngen Sohmers: I told him I was done with Gor, going to Ancient Worlds, life would be good.

[2008/10/24 1:40]  Syngen Sohmers: Which by the is how I actually got captured.

[2008/10/24 1:41]  Syngen Sohmers: He does the whole cap thing, I get into a HUGE chick fight or twelve with his other slaves, but he doesn’t force me to RP.  He doesn’t treat me like a slave at all.  He left me alone for the first two weeks

[2008/10/24 1:42]  Nima Sirnah: hmmm.

[2008/10/24 1:42]  Syngen Sohmers: Left me in Egypt.  He would come and play in Egypt sometimes, Where, I was kind of a power player, but basically when everyoneone else yanks on the leash and tries to force you in

[2008/10/24 1:42]  Syngen Sohmers: He just sat back.

[2008/10/24 1:42]  Nima Sirnah nods

[2008/10/24 1:43]  Syngen Sohmers: The only time he asked me to do anything during that time was to come see Glorious Ar.  Just because the build was cool.

[2008/10/24 1:43]  Nima Sirnah: I haven’t seen it.

[2008/10/24 1:43]  Syngen Sohmers: It is a cool build.

[2008/10/24 1:44]  Syngen Sohmers: Now while he’s not dragging me into Gor.  He’s talking to me constantly.  About everything that has nothing to do with Gor.

[2008/10/24 1:44]  Syngen Sohmers: Sports, movies, video games, the weather..whatever

[2008/10/24 1:51]  Syngen Sohmers: But you know something.  He’s always patient with me.  Even when I’m pissed and hormonal and railing at him.  he just sits back real quiet and waits for me to fuss myself out.

[2008/10/24 1:51]  Syngen Sohmers: He doesn’t try to make me be happy all the time.  He likes that I’m a whole person.  That my slavery drives me crazy most of the time.

[2008/10/24 1:52]  Nima Sirnah: You’re a HUMAN

[2008/10/24 1:52]  Nima Sirnah: For a truly dominant man that has to be the most enticing thing.

Is it?

Ti Winz

October 23, 2008

Dear Guy on the End of the Leash:

 

You are an insensitive clod.  What the heck kind of way is that to ask a girl out anyways?  Make me cook for you, then knock me out and take me home.  Nuh uh buddy, not on the first date.  Though apparently this was a trend for you, as you locked me up with your psycho girlfriend.  Oh yeah like SHE wouldn’t mind.

And what is up with this collar?  I’m constantly “Accidentally” losing the thing.  I probably wouldn’t bother to get it back through NUMEROUS trouble tickets if the animations in it weren’t crazy expensive.  It doesn’t go with everything, I’m constantly having to take it off for work, and there’s your name stamped RIGHT on my neck for all to see.  Like I WANT people to know you can beat up a girl.

 

God, you’re so demanding.  All I was doing was pushing prims around.  And you wanted more.  You wouldn’t even ask me if I could do it.  You’d just tell me to.  I TOLD you me and photoshop don’t get along.  Did you care?  Nuuuu.  I TOLD you I wasn’t much of a builder.  Did that matter?  Nuuuu.  And now look at me you jerk, people think I can build.

 

You’ve totally ruined my shopping experiences.  Instead of buying the happy silly things I used to, like clothes and hair, I shop for textures and sculpt maps.  Instead of just buying that couch I liked, I go home and build the stupid thing.  And damn you if it doesn’t look better the second time I build something.

 

Fine.  So you drag me around all over the grid like you own me.  So when I need the cuddle time, when I need the sweet words and soft touches, what do you do?  Tell me to get over it and bend over.  Nice.  Can’t take a girl out for dinner sometimes?  And then?  You have to pass me off to your friends?  Heck, you pass me off to people you don’t even know.  How do you know one of them isn’t going to be all sweet and tender and mushy and win my heart?

 

I know how you know.  Cause you took the damned thing.  And I hate you for it.  I hate how vulnerable you make me.  I hate how you strip me down with just a word.  I hate how I find myself wanting to be near you.  I hate not being the smooth operator, totally in control.  You play dirty.  You cheat.  You don’t give me space.

 

And when you do, you sick bastard, I sink in on myself, I collapse.  I can’t find even false honey to drip on other people.  You leave me so emotionally raw and naked that I can’t hide it from anyone else when it hurts.  You leave me starving, naked bitter, and then…God I want to kick you in the shin.  Really hard.  So hard…..it’ll leave a bruise.  Because then.  You tell me to get over it. Like it’s a fucking switch you flick on and off.  Well, I guess YOU do.  I’m still stumbling around in the damned dark.

 

Sometimes you seem so damned dense.  I stand there and rail at you, practically screaming at you what’s wrong.  And you tell me to shut up and go to sleep, that I’m tired and cranky.  Shyeah, you make me tired and cranky.  God why don’t you just listen to me?  Placate me?  Soothe me down?  You could you know.  I know you’re not stupid.

 

You take away all my control, and then, I’m supposed to trust you?  When it feels like I’m falling down a hole, I’m supposed to expect yout to be there to catch me at the bottom?  Pfft I hope I give you a hernia with all this carrying around.

 

And then….the sickest thing of all.  You touch me.  Just when I can’t stand you anymore.  Just when I’ve had enough.  Just when I want pound my fists over and over into you and want to be anywhere else but near you, you yank that piddly bit of chain and pull me close and for whatever deranged wild dizzying moment I feel almost human again.

 

I hate loving you.  Why the hell do you have to be so geeky it’s cute?  So smart and funny you suck me in?  Why can’t you just be a dumb beefhead?  Why can’t you just let me fake it?

 

Yours, whether I like it or not.

I started working with Dream last night at GOL’s 5th Element club as a Hostess.  Basically to pick up the mood in the room, harass and harangue people onto the dance floor, and be sociable where she doesn’t feel sociable.

Turned out, she said she eneded up having way more fun with someone to play off of.  I had a blast.  And we totally rocked the naughty schoolgirl look.

I needed to have fun.  the OOC meeting went…not so well.  But it wasn’t so much a matter of debate and discussion as a warning.  I’m likely never going to be spoken to again RP wise.  But.  there’s prices to pay for the things we want.  I want to feel like I did Saturday pretty regularly.  I want to know him, to crawl back inside his head, to be able to anticipate what he’s going to say because we’re thinking the same way. 

I’m trusting him to want that as well.  

Tara’s been an adjustment process for me.  I got incredibly spoiled those months before the sim rezzed, being the solo girl, no city no other girls to divide his attention.  Was like, way more than any slave could ever reasonably hope for.  And I knew it was temporary and I knew it would be given up.  But god it was so delish, I didn’t want to really.

The city is one thing.  It’s a mutual excuse.  But Tara is solely his excuse.  I don’t think Tara’s a bad thing.  I’ve come to realize that when you get down to it, there’s only so far he can go with me.  Tara’s in a better and more open position than I am.  And on the whole is a more open person.    She understands her own submission.  I understand being owned.  And for him, it’s kind of like chocolate cake with a really rich frosting.  He gets the best of both.  The mildly rebellious but thoroughly owned.  And the total submissive, also thoroughly owned.  Really, from his perspective…I totally see him not complaining.

From mine…Yeah well.  We all have our shortcomings.  And he’s a stoic man with a limited emotional vocabulary at times.  Okay most times.  I’ll probably always be adjusting, I’ll probably never get it quite right.

One of the REALLY good days

October 19, 2008

I have them.

Sometimes they are rare, but I have them.

I logged out last night after a stream of venom and invective at him.  I was sick of him doing nothing, I was sick of working my ass off only to be ignored.  I was sick in general.

I asked him to release me, and he said no.  Why keep me?  My perspective was not just the ignored slave, but the flat out avoided slave.  I didn’t understand him anymore.  I couldn’t anticipate his thoughts and wants.  And he wasn’t really speaking to me.  I was scared to talk to him, because it seemed like every time I did, I pissed him off.  Because I was pissed off, I wanted him pissed off to.  Besides, then, it seemed he would notice me.

When he logged in today.  I didn’t expect anything to be different.  He did the toekn pull me aside and tell me he was thinking of me thing.  But it felt weird…uncomfortable.

Then we got the heck out of the house.  We went to a slick rezzable gallery Sacha had shown me.  We went to the Davinci Gardens.  He took me to Mars.  He took me to the sun itself.  He took me to another world, and we goofed off.

Then we did go home.  And we talked.  We identified problems and decided on solutions.

And I look friggin hawt in a Plug suit.

I didn’t feel any less the slave for it.  I just needed to be reminded why I was his in the first place.  There’s a vibe, and the vibe works.  When we slough off all the outside crap and just have to deal with each other,  each falls into their position naturally.

I Win.

October 18, 2008

I got them all.. And am totally gloating over the matter.

Saligia of Gor – Wrath

October 12, 2008

Anger is destructive.

It eats you up inside, seeded in frustration, then irritation, then annoyance…so on…until you are consumed by it.

 

But, like any emotion, it’s a force, and can be used for good.  To be righteous.  To find courage where you had none.

Gluttony – Saligia of Gor

October 11, 2008